depressing and hopeful

Depressing
Today I finally sat down and organized all of our paperwork - IEPs and evaluations - that I've had in various files and floating around the house for the last couple of years.  I put everything in a 3 inch 3 ring binder with categories such as: evaluations/2011/2012/manifestation determination/report cards. It was heartbreaking to sit down and see it all in one place. We went from Kindergarten report card of delightful little person with almost all 4's (working above standard) to daily report cards with tallies for each swear word, hit, kick, burp, etc and academics that are falling off grade level.  It was so sad I was not even hungry for lunch when I was done. It took almost two hours and completely filled the notebook.  One thing I realized I am so thankful for with Calvin's new school is that they do NOT send home daily behavior reports. There is really no benefit in giving me a daily update on every little bad thing that happens. They do have to keep track so they can report if things are improving or not, but I don't see it every day. I get  a call if there is a restraint or something else I NEED to know, otherwise we just discuss things at our meetings to see where things need improvement.

Hopeful
A few weeks ago I was out walking the dog and stopped to talk to a girl (about my age) who was standing in her driveway with her little one year old baby. I stopped to say hi since she was living in a house I knew had recently sold and wanted to say hi and see where they came from and if they had other kids, etc. After about one minute of talking she mentioned that she is a therapist/coach for autistic families. I told her I had a special needs child with similar needs to autistic kids and asked if she would mind if I stopped by another time to ask her a few questions so that she could direct me to groups or individuals who could help me in my situation. At the time I saw her I had two kids and the dog and was in a hurry to get back to school to pick up Clare. Anyway, we met this week and she did give me some good ideas of some services she sees her clients use.  It was helpful talking to her to obtain this information. I was completely flabbergasted when she next offered to work with our family at the cost of our copay ($15/visit) until we are accepted with one of the other groups I am applying for. The wait list is months-year since most families use services long term. I am still shocked by this offer. Most of these types of professionals charge $60-$100/hour and that is why I have never found one I could use. I simply can't afford to pay someone what would be close to $10K/year.  The reason she is offering to work for so little is that when she had her baby she pulled her self out of the full time professional world only maintaining a couple of her long term clients. However, she loves her work and would love to help our family. Since we live down the street from her it is pretty convenient and ideal for her to drop in and help us out once a week. I am hopeful she will be able to help us, even if it is in some small way. She is the reason I was getting the binder together so that she can see our history and get to know us on paper before she starts coming over. I should have gotten a little more organized long ago but I didn't know how. It was her suggestion to get the binder and file by date and category.

Also, I am trying once again to get Calvin occupational therapy. Over a year ago when he was evaluated by the autism department and the behavioral and developmental pediatrician they both recommended we get him in OT. I took him to an evaluation but he was not cooperative and the insurance denied our claim so I gave up.  I am trying again with a new group (one used to autistic kids instead of one that works with injured kids -- huge difference) and also thanks to a few phone calls, I know better how to approach the insurance company so they'll pay for it.

Also, I found several sport teams that work with special needs kids, at least one for each major sport - baseball, basketball, soccer.  It is good to know these options are out there and I am sure over the years we will give them a try.